A mailbox with a bridal bouquet on it.“Good morning, my name is Tabatha, I’m sorry for your wait. How may I help you?”

“Oh.” Frank was startled back to the present.“Yeah, jeeze, I’ve been on hold for like twenty minutes.” His voice was edged with anger.

“I do apologize for that sir. We are experiencing heavier than usual traffic volume following the holiday.” Tabatha’s voice remained upbeat, if not downright perky. “I’ll be happy to assist you now. Can you tell me the nature of your call?”

Frank glared across the room at the Christmas present he had bought for himself. She blankly stared back at him.

“Well, yeah.” Now that it came down to it he found it hard to talk to the woman on the other end of the line. Why couldn’t he have gotten a man? “I’m not happy with this item I purchased from you, and I’d like to return it for a full refund.”

“I see, sir. Can you give me your purchase ID?”

“Purchase ID?”

“It’s in the upper right hand corner of the invoice.”

“Oh, sure.” He fumbled with the phone as he sorted through the paperwork. “Yeah, here it is. ZB104-2271953.”

There was some quick keyboarding on the other end of the line.

“Yes sir. I see you purchased Anna Marie, from our line of Eternal Bliss Instant Brides. Is there a problem sir?”

“Well, yeah!” He kept his voice just below a shout. “I don’t want her. She’s creepy. And she stinks!”

“I’m sorry you are disappointed with your purchase, sir. I’m afraid all our reanimated brides are non-returnable items. Failure to rehydrate is the only acceptable reason for a return. Did she rehydrate?”

Frank shuddered at the memory. He had been so excited when the package arrived, could hardly believe there was a real woman in a bag no bigger than a loaf of bread. Like they say, the Human body is something like 90% water. The instructions said to place Anna Marie in a bathtub full of warm water, wait twenty-four hours for complete re-hydration, carefully assist her from the tub, gently pat dry, and then wait twelve hours before use to allow all of her systems to properly stabilize. He’d gotten a boner just drawing the tub.

Then, around midnight, he’d woken up to the most god awful smell. At first he went to the front door, but stepping outside made it clear the smell was coming from inside the house. His nose led him to the bathroom. When he looked in the tub he almost lost it. The ‘loaf of bread’ lay at the bottom of the tub, completely submerged, and had expanded into a grotesque approximation of a woman, about three feet long, curled in a fetal position, shriveled skin, and with dead looking eyes staring up from under the water. It was all he could do to keep from hurling. He’d bolted from the bathroom, slamming the door behind him.

“Well, yeah.” He hated to admit it, but she had rehydrate properly. When he looked again in the morning he saw a drop-dead beautiful woman laying in the tub. She now floated, her face, breasts, and thighs just breaking the surface. But she still had that vacant stare and the stench had not gone away. “She rehydrated.”

“I’m glad to hear that, sir. As indicated before, if the reanimated bride properly rehydrated we cannot accept it as a return.”

“But she stinks!” Now he did shout.

Tabatha remained cheerful in the face of his distress. “I am sorry sir. The catalog did discuss that particular limitation…”

“It said there was a slight odor the user could easily mask!” He rubbed the back of his neck in frustration. “I sprayed her with about a half a can of Lysol, and it hasn’t helped much.”

“The odor will dissipate over time, sir. You can speed the process with frequent showers, and we recommend Fabreeze. It also helps to keep the windows open.”

“It’s 38 degrees outside. I can’t open the windows!”

“You can place your bride outside while you wait for the smell to dissipate…”

“In the cold?”

“She’s already dead, sir. I assure you, the cold won’t hurt her.”

That reminded him of something else he hadn’t considered when he’d made the purchase.

“Uh, so what does she eat?”

“Oh, no worries there sir. All of our reanimated products have been modified to turn off the appetite. She doesn’t eat or drink anything. She’s completely safe.” He could almost see Tabatha smirking at the other end of the line.

He looked at Anna Marie sitting there naked, dripping water on his couch. God, what a mistake. Still, he had to admit, she was beautiful, if slightly gray.

“Her color’s awful.” This, almost to himself.

“I can recommend our Eternal Bliss body make up and perfume kit, sir. It comes highly recommend by others who have bought this product. It’s just $59.99.”

Frank dropped his head in resignation as he reached to get his credit card from his wallet.

He could kick himself for not just settling for the blow up doll.
~

© 2014 by J.M. Strother, all rights reserved. Photo © 2014 by J.M. Strother, all rights reserved.

 

A cartoon picture of Frankenstein.I let out a quiet curse as I stepped to the windows to draw the curtains for the evening. Dave’s car was just pulling into the driveway. My dear sweet brother, Dave. Goddammit.

Not bothering to close the curtains I made my way to the front door. I opened it just as he was about to knock. He stepped back, a little surprised, and flashed me his best car-salesman smile.

“Whoa! You startled me.” He took another step back to make room for the storm door as I swung it open for him.

“I saw you pull into the drive.” He nodded in understanding. “So, what’s up?” Like I didn’t know.

He gave a slight shrug as he stepped inside. His eyes scanned the hallway and the living room beyond. “Just wanted to drop by and say hi.” He started toward the kitchen. “Got any beer?”

We settled at the kitchen table, each nursing a bottle of lite beer. I opened a tin of nuts and we nibbled at them between sips.

“Haven’t seen you in a while,” Dave said. In fact it had been three months. “What you been up to?”

“Nothing special. Still the daily grind, down at the office.”

He bobbed his head up and down in commiseration. “Yeah, no rest for the wicked, eh? Can’t remember the last time I had a Saturday off. The car business has certainly recovered, I can tell you that. I’ve sold over a million dollars worth already this year.” He beamed with pride.

“Congratulations.”

“There’s going to be a banquet for all the million dollar dealers around Christmas time. You want to come?”

I frowned a bit. “Is it a good date?”

His smile looked somewhat forced. “Not sure yet.”

“Well, that could be awkward.”

He took a large pull off his beer. “Yeah, the 6th would be bad. Hopefully they’ll pick the 13th or the 20th.”

“Thirteen’s bad luck,” I observed. “Aren’t you lot a superstitious sort? And the 20th is awful close to Christmas…”

“I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it.” His good spirits seemed to be waning. His eyes darted around, not focusing on anything. He does that when he’s trying to change the subject. But what he wanted to change the subject to wasn’t much of a change at all. Not really.

“So,” he began, “we going to see you next Wednesday?”

Dive right in.

I sipped at my beer. Frowned. “I don’t think so.”

I saw the anger flash in his eyes.

“I’m really sick of Randy,” I said. “And frankly, the others aren’t much better.”

“You going out by yourself?” he asked, incredulous. “Lone wolfs don’t fare too well.”

“Wolves.”

“What?”

“It’s lone wolves, not wolfs.”

His face contorted into a grimace. “You and your freaking grammar. It’s shit like that that gets you picked on.”

“No, it’s Randy being a prick that gets me picked on. Alice and Fredda eat it up, which just eggs him on. I’m not doing it anymore, Dave. I’m done with the pack.”

He almost rose out of his chair.

“You can’t run alone. It’s too damned dangerous.”

He was actually concerned about me. How touching.

“I won’t run alone—.”

“You found another pack?” He was dumbfounded.

“No. I just won’t run.”

He stared at me in silence for a good thirty seconds, the veins in his neck visibly throbbing. He turned in his chair and looked at the basement door. “You don’t have a freaking cage down there, do you?”

I said nothing.

He jumped up, pulling at the hair on the back of his head and let out a howl toward the kitchen light. He slammed his fist down on the table so hard his beer bottle fell over. It was nearly empty, so no mess made. “No brother of mine locks himself up in a cage for a full moon! No, dammit! No!”

I shrugged, but made no reply.

He started toward the basement door, then stopped and whirled back toward me. “I can’t look. Shit, Tim, what will Mom say? It’ll kill her.”

“Not if you don’t tell her.”

He paced back and forth.

“You can’t do this. You’ll bring shame on the whole family.”

“I’m going to live my life the way I see fit, Dave. I’m done running. There are more of us then you realize, and we get along just fine without the pack.”

“What? You got a freaking support group?” His voice was heavy with sarcasm.

I nodded. “Yes, as a matter of fact we do. We meet the day before the full moon, eat rare steaks, have a few Margaritas, and give each other the kind of support a pack ought to give. We don’t have to bare our throats to some stupid asshole who thinks he better than everyone else. We just have a good time, help each other through, and go back to work the next day.”

He stood there, wild eyed, panting. You’d think the Moon was raising.

I gestured toward his chair. “You’re welcome to join us if you’d like.”

At that he spun on his heel and headed for the front door. As he jerked it open he snarled over his shoulder, “Mom’s going to have a fit!”
~
© 2014 by J. M. Strother, all rights reserved.

Image used by permission, © by Angie Capozello, for use with the #FridayFlash Halloween Humor and Horror contest.

 

He slipped from one back yard to the next, trying doorknobs as he went, casting furtive glances over his shoulder to check if he’d been spotted. They were close, way too close for comfort, and he needed to find somewhere to go to ground for a while.

His heart skipped a beat when the knob in his hand actually turned. He held his breath, hardly daring to believe his luck. If luck held the house would be empty, and there wouldn’t be any ugly complications. He turned the knob slowly until he could tell there was no longer any resistance from the bolt before pushing gently inward.

A little light shone from an above-counter fixture in the kitchen. There was the slight hum of the refrigerator, but otherwise the house was quite. Best of all, no barking dog to give him away. Please let these people be out of town, he silently begged. I just need one night for things to cool off. He stepped inside and carefully closed the door behind him.

He took a moment to look around, to get his bearings. Nice place. Attractively decorated, with all the latest in electronics in the adjoining family room. Whoever lived here did all right by themselves. A momentary thought crossed his mind, to lock the door, but he shook that off. Maybe they always left it unlocked, and to find it locked would send up a red flag. Judging by the amount of swag, he doubted it, but people are funny.

After checking the garage he was able to breath a little easier – no cars present. These folks must really be gone. Out for the evening, or out of town? Probably not out of town. Surely they would have locked up tight if they were leaving for more than a few minutes.

That thought got his heart racing again. He needed to find somewhere to hide in the event they did come home.

He silently crept deeper inside.

~

“OK, sweetie, I want you into your PJs and your teeth brushed, like pronto.” Marybeth gave little Pete a playful swat on the butt as they came in from the garage. “No arguments, and no more candy. It’s late. Mommy’s tired.”

The Halloween party at Rachel’s had been exhausting enough, but then she had to also swing by and pick up groceries or there would be no milk in the morning.

Pete, still in his cowboy outfit, rushed off but paused in the middle of the kitchen.

“Can I have some chocolate milk?” He gave her his best puppy dog eyes and all so innocent smile.

“No, you can’t.” She juggled two bags of groceries onto the counter nearest the fridge. “And leave that bag on the table, you’ve had enough for tonight. Now go brush your teeth. I’ll be in to tell you a story in a minute. Go on. Scoot!”

He reluctantly put his bag of goodies on the table, then spun and rushed off for his room.

By the time she had the groceries put away Pete had on his PJs, and had brushed his teeth. When she stepped into his room he was in bed with his covers pulled up to his chin.

“Mom! There’s a monster under the bed!” His eyes were wide with fear.

Not this again.

“There is no monster under the bed, Pete. We’ve talked about this over and over—”

“Yes there is! I really saw it this time! There is!”

She let out an exasperated breath. “Stop. Just stop, or there will be no story time.”

“Mom.” His plea was heart-wrenching. “Please look! Please!”

“You have got to get over this.” But how could she ignore such a plea? Against her better judgment she knelt down and stooped to look under the bed.

Her scream was cut off by the hand that shot out and grabbed her by the throat.

Pete’s screams died a few moments later.

~ © 2014 by J. M. Strother, all rights reserved.

 

I could tell Molly got her second wind as soon as the Neimeyer’s house came into view. She straighten up, shifted the bag of goodies from her left hand to the right, and quickened her pace. I grimaced and reached out to gently grab her shoulder.

“Well sweety, I think it’s about time to head on home.” I kept my voice light and cheerful.

She squirmed out of my grasp, whirled round, placed her free hand on her hip in a scold, and stomped her little foot at me. “I want to go to the green house! They are the bestest.” Her purple fairy wings bobbed up and down with each syllable of her angry retort.

True, the Neimeyers were the bestest. Never a hint of crotchetiness crept into their old age. They always had a kind word for anyone crossing their path. They were known for their generous spirit, especially among the young on Halloween, it being well known throughout the neighborhood that they gave away full sized candy bars.

Not this year.

“They’re not home, sweetheart.” I squatted down to be more on Molly’s level and pointed to the darkened house. “See? No lights on.”

The police turned all the lights off when they had left.

Her lower lip came out in a pout as she looked at the house. “Why aren’t they home?” There was more than just disappointment at not getting a big candy bar in her voice. She truly liked George and Helen Neimeyer. Her face lit up any time we ran into them.

We tried not to talk about it around her, but I suspect she had heard at least some of our muffled conversations. I hated lying to my little girl. I ran my hand through my hair as I rocked back a bit on my heals. How much to say? How far to go? No. She was still too young to know the awful truth. Still, she needed some of it.

“I’m sorry, sweety. They passed away.”

The bag of candy landed on the sidewalk with a thud. There was a moment of stunned silence as she struggled to contain the tears forming in her eyes. “Like Nana Bowman?”

I reached out and cupped my hand at the nape of her neck, rubbing gently and nodded. “Yes. Like grandma.”

The tears and sobs came in a sudden rush as she leaned into me, burying her face in my chest. I hoisted her onto my shoulder and she wrapped her arms around my neck as I stood, then I dipped at the knees to nab the bag of candy she left forgotten on the walk.

“Let’s go home sweety.” I shook the bag. “I think you already have more than you had last year.” Another placating lie. She made no objection.

I turned and hurried home. Alice awaited us there, alone, giving out candy. And they still hadn’t caught the guy.

 

I remember the last words he ever said to me as he headed out the door.

“I’ll be back in a bit.” He flashed me his silly little smile. “If I don’t get hit by a meteor, that is.”

Who would have ever thought?
~

(c)2014 by J. M. Strother, all rights reserved.

 

I am currently in the midst of a reformation, or perhaps a recalibration. I let a lot of things go to pot over the last year – the yard, my weight, my language. During the course of Cyndi’s illness I became something of a short fuse, and could spew forth curse words at the slightest provocation, not at Cyndi mind you, nor the girls, but certainly within their hearing. I was circumspect enough to hold my tongue in public, but it was an effort.

Dropping a knife on the floor while loading the dishwasher would garner a few muttered choice words. Breaking the pull ties on a trash bag would generate a brief, though quite vocal, soliloquy. More serious matters would likely result in a regular diatribe of profanity.

I always apologized to those around me after one of these outbursts, and I felt bad for losing my temper, still the cursing went on.

After Cyndi died the cursing did not stop, nor noticeably decline all that much, despite the lower stress levels. Until one day, after apologizing to Em for going off on some insignificant matter within her hearing she said to me, “It’s like you don’t have a filter anymore.”

That really gave me pause.

That is not the person I want to be.

So, I have been making a concerted effort to cut down on my cussing. It had turned into a bad habit, and one I need to break.

Breaking bad habits is not easy, but I am making steady improvement. As silly as it sounds I try to give myself positive reinforcement simply by saying, out loud to myself, “I didn’t cuss.” It seems to be working.

Know what? I actually feel better about myself now. I only wish I had seen the light sooner, so my wife did not have to listen to my foul language in her final months. But regrets get one nowhere. All I can do now is continue to try to improve.

I am making steady improvements on those other fronts as well. I am slowly losing weight, and the yard looks much better.

I think Cyndi would be pleased.

~jon

 

I was saddened when I heard that a young unarmed black man was shot and killed by a City of Ferguson police officer. My initial thought was, oh no, not again. Very shortly afterward I thought, while the incident would certainly elicit angry protests, that this being St. Louis, the lid would not pop off into violence.

St. Louis is known for its calm demeanor. During the riots of the 60′s St. Louis was one of the few major cities in the US not to experience rioting. When we win the World Series or (infrequently at best) Super Bowl, the St. Louis fans do not spill out onto the streets to overturn cars and set dumpsters on fire. So the last thing I expected was an overnight riot and looting.

When I learned of the rioting mid-morning the next day I was stunned. I really didn’t expect something like that to happen here, in suburban St. Louis. I guess that just shows how out of touch I really am.

I am not so out of touch that I don’t know there are deeply wrought racial divides in this community, or that the frustration level of the powerless and disenfranchised is probably running near record levels. I simply did not expect violence. The shooting of Michael Brown, and the official police response to it, seems to have been the final straw to bring everything down.

The rioting left me saddened, both for the store owners whose businesses were violated, and for the community around them, for there will be long term negative ramifications, both economic and social. And being aware of some of the racial sentiments of this town, I knew certain elements would use the riot and looting to paint an entire segment of our society with a broad stereotyping brush. Reading some of the comments on local news stories proved me right. Please, people, don’t go there.

Yes, there were people who destroyed and stole property. Yes, they should be prosecuted to the full extent of the law. But there were also people who came out the very next day, black people mind you, who helped clean up, who offered apologies, who pleaded for calm. Unfortunately many of these efforts were met with suspicion, if not downright hostility. Perhaps that is understandable considering the hurt the business people had just gone through.

But what white America must come to see, must come to understand, is the hurt the black community goes through all the time. Remember my first reaction – oh no, not again. How many Trayvon Martins, Eric Garners, and Michael Browns does it take to make us realize something is drastically wrong?

I have yet to verify it, but one thing I read said Michael Brown was initially stopped for jaywalking. Jaywalking? I jaywalk almost every day, sometimes in front of police cars. I have never been stopped for it. Not once in over 50 years. Why is that, do you think?

Jaywalking is not a capital offense. Yet this young man ended up dead. I certainly understand that outrage.

Yes, the rioters and looters should be prosecuted. But so too should police officers who cross the line in the use of reasonable force. So too should police officers who threaten the very core of our democracy by attempting to suppress and intimidate the press.

We all need to step back, black and white, and stop looking at each other as the other. We are all in this together folks. We all desperately need to learn to listen to each other and take each others concerns with the seriousness and respect they deserve.

 

A NASA concept image of a space station.I hovered just outside the circle of Dockside officers surrounding Captain McGuire, trying to catch his eye. No doubt they were busy, what with launch just six hours away, but I really needed to bring this issue up with him post haste. McGuire was known for his temper, as well as his disdain for civvy staff members. Since I’m definitely a civvy I dared not interrupt. Hendricks, our Chief Operations Officer here on LF-4, finally left the little cluster of uniforms and the Captain cast me a skeptical glance.

“What is it, Abbot? You’ve been dancing around there like you’ve had to piss in the worst way for the last half hour. Get it off your chest.”

Clearing my throat, I stepped forward, close to the remaining circle, yet not actually joining it. Fleet boys have an overdeveloped sense of personal space and have been known to deck anyone stupid enough to intrude. The three remaining officers stood nonchalant regarding me with smiles, bordering on sneers. I paused, uncertain of myself, of the situation. “Get it off your chest,” was a questionable invitation at best.

“Sir, I need to talk to you about the supply situation.” The sneer on Lieutenant Du Val’s face melted into a blank, unreadable expression. Lieutenant Anderson looked at her watch.

As Dockside Logistics Specialist for this launch it was my job to make sure everything was properly procured, delivered, and stowed aboard the ship before we sent her on her way. Once launched there’s no turning back, no resupply. First Crew would not emerge from stasis until the ship reached its full cruising speed, in about three years. The survival of the colonists depended upon a full manifest.

I cleared my throat again. “There seems to be a problem.”

Lieutenant Du Val frowned, folding his arms over his chest. Sub Lieutenant Gamble assumed Parade Rest, hands behind his back. His half smile-half sneer remained on his face. Anderson looked like she suddenly remembered something needing doing, and departed at a good clip.

I did not interpret the officers’ body language as good signs, and felt my situation growing tenuous.

“May I speak to you in private?”

Captain McGuire scowled, ever so briefly, then jerked his head to the side, dismissing the others. Du Val saluted and walked away, casting a black glance my way. Gamble stood off to about 3 meters and resumed his at ease position.

“What’s on your mind, young lady?” McGuire asked, his countenance all sincerity and concern.

“I’ve just finished my inventory, Captain, and there are critical shortages in the supplies.”

McGuire looked puzzled and stepped a bit closer to me. “What do you mean? Last week you told me everything was well accounted for.”

“Last week everything was well accounted for. I supervised that inventory personally, and everything was there down to the last gram of coffee.”

“Then how can there possibly be any shortages?” he asked, scratching his graying beard. “And what kind of shortages are we talking about here? Food? Medicine? Materials?”

“Yes. Yes to all of that. Plus equipment. Two tractors are missing. Otherwise, about 30% of the food and building materials have disappeared, and fully half of the pain killers.”

He shook his head in disbelief. “That can’t be right. All those supplies have been under guard and seal since their arrival. Either you must have made a mistake upon delivery, or are mistaken now. I can’t see how they could have just gotten up and walked away.”

My stomach dropped.

“With all due respect, Sir, there was no mistake. Then or now. Obviously someone has stolen these goods, and in doing so put the lives of hundreds of colonists in peril.” I could not help letting my eyes drift toward Sub Lieutenant Gamble. As if being reminded he was there, Captain McGuire turned and signaled the Officer over. As Gamble approached I took a reflexive step back.

“Yes, Sir?” Gamble stood rigidly at ease.

“Joe, Liz here seems to think there is a problem with the supply inventory.”

“Sir?”

“She says close to a third of it has disappeared.”

Gamble’s face remained a study in stone.

“You can confirm that Warehouses 6 and 7 have been under 24/7 security?” McGuire looked stern.

“Yes, Sir!”

“And that the contents were moved, in their entirety, aboard the SS Hudson last night?”

“Yes, sir. I observed the transfer personally.”

“But–” McGuire cut me off with a gesture.

“And that the hold has been under constant guard since being sealed?”

“Yes, sir.”

McGuire turned to me with a skeptical, half bemused look on his face. “I think you must have made a mistake, Ms Abbot.” I opened my mouth to object, but he cut me off again. “Now don’t fret. We’ll double check everything, and believe me, if anything is missing – one, I will personally lead the investigation, and two, we will not launch until any shortfall has been filled. Thank you for coming to me with this. We’ll get on it right away.” He turned to Gamble. “See to it, Joe.”

“Yes, Sir!” Sub Lieutenant Gamble saluted, smirked at me, turned on his heal, and marched away.

“Captain!”

McGuire glared at me. “I think we are done here, Ms Abbot. Dismissed.”

He walked off, leaving me drained and shaken.

I knew what I needed to do. I had to downlink right away. I turned and rushed back to my quarters.

I locked the door even as I noticed my message board blinking. When I called up the text any hope for support melted away. Instead of a reassuring message from Captain McGuire, it was orders. I was being reassigned. I was the new Logistics Specialist for SS Hudson. I was to report onboard within the hour. As I reached for the communications console my door swept open. Two Marines stepped in, one to each side, followed by a grinning Lieutenant Du Val.

“Good afternoon, Liz. Come with us please. Oh, don’t bother to pack.”
~

© 2014 by J. M. Strother. All rights reserved.

NASA image believed to be in the public domain.

 

TheWestPicture

The West

Alternating bands of brown and green
Leeward and windward
Spare rough country
Magnificent in its own right
Broken by the next ridge
The next valley.
Yet the lush green of forest and field
Will not be denied,
A celebration of the power of life.
Such contradiction
Repeating in rolling waves
As I travel the American west.

 

I’ll be out on the road soon, embarking on a long overdue vacation. The plan is to work my way west, through South Dakota, Wyoming, Idaho and on to Washington to visit an old friend along the coast. It’s always more fun to travel with a friend than alone, so another old and mutual friend has agreed to go with me. We can share the driving, and out west that’s an important feature.

We plan to hit the Strategic Air and Space Museum in Omaha, Nebraska, then on to The Badlands and Mount Rushmore in South Dakota. Then it’s on to Devil’s Tower to look for aliens, Yellowstone to try to avoid being eaten by bears, and the Grand Tetons for some fabulous photos. (Is it possible to take a bad photo of the Tetons?)

We’ll work our way though Idaho the long way, then on to Mount Rainier, the Seattle Space Needle, and ultimately a ferry to my friend’s place.

The return trip will take a more southerly route but is less planned in case we have to make tracks. If all goes well though, we will see central Oregon, Idaho again, the Bonneville Salt Flats, Mesa Verde, and Pikes Peak. That’s a lot to take in, so we may have to skip some of the sites on the way back.

The purpose of this trip is two fold. One, of course, is to see our friend. The other is that I hope the change of scene will be restorative for me. You may know that my wife died in February, and the last three years have emotionally drained me. My creative spark is pretty well gone. This trip just may rekindle it, and I know she would be glad for me if it does.

I’ve laid in a two week supply of groceries for the kids, who will be dog sitting for me, and stocked up on a two week supply of The Best of Friday Flash to take along with me. I plan to drop them off along the way, either as public nuisances, err… surprises, or as gifts to anyone who happens to find me along the way. I’d love to run into some of the folks who have been participating in #FridayFlash all these years. So if our paths come close please drop me a line and maybe we can meet up for a chat over a cuppa whatever (I don’t drink coffee).

I hope to give my first one away in or around the Strategic Air and Space Museum in Ashland, Nebraska, on Tuesday, May 21st. I’ll be the fat old guy wearing the ESRI cap and carrying around a copy of BOFF1. Just say, “Hey,” and it’s yours.

I expect the next give away will be in the vicinity of Mount Rushmore. I’ll update, with pics, as we go. Now we just need to hope the snow is finally and truly gone.
~jon

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